Is it possible to have a successful long-distance relationship? Yes!
Is it hard? Yes!!
Keep reading for some tips on how to survive the distance!
My experience with long-distance relationships
When my fiancé and I first started dating we lived about 160+ miles away from one another. I knew as soon as we decided to start dating it was going to take a ton of effort to make the relationship work. I’m glad to say that we survived the distance but I will admit that we hit a couple of bumps along the way. Here’s how I think we survived:
The number one tip, and I cannot stress this enough, is communication. I know you have probably heard this a thousand times. Communication is a major key. If you cannot effectively communicate with your partner, that leaves room for so many things to go wrong. You should be as open and honest with your partner from the beginning. Share your expectations with one another. Doing this should help you both have a clear understanding of where you see the relationship going.
This can look like:
- Making sure to always tell each other goodnight, before bed.
- “Good Morning” text or phone call
- Never going to bed angry (huge no, no!)
- If you are going to be out of reach for some time, let your significant other know
Having clear expectations in the relationship helps to build trust, which leads me to my next tip.
If there is no trust, there is no us!
If you cannot trust your partner, you are on track for disaster. I will admit that it’s even harder to build trust with someone who lives in another state but not impossible. In your relationship, you should feel comfortable enough to share your feelings. So if something makes you feel uncomfortable, say it!
For example, when Rob and I first started dating he let me know from the beginning about his close female friends. This was something I already knew, of course, because I had scanned through his social media LOL! I let him know that as long as there was respect on both sides, I could care less. I can’t tell somebody to get rid of friends they have had long before me. If there was ever something that made me feel uncomfortable, I made it known and we discussed it.
Along with trust comes respect. You and your partner should have a certain level of respect for one another and your relationship. That means you shouldn’t put yourself in a situation that would hurt your partner or the relationship.
Let’s say, your single girlfriends want to go out, girl’s night! Does that mean you have to stay home? No! You can still hang out with your girls and have a good time. I hate when people say things like if you’re in a relationship you shouldn’t have single friends. That’s absolutely absurd to me. My girls and I go out to have a good time, not to find men. I can still go out to enjoy myself and be respectful. Being in a relationship should not stop you from enjoying yourself with friends.
As hard as it might be, you must make time to see each other. It could be helpful to come up with a schedule. Maybe you alternate who goes to see who, so one person doesn’t feel like they are putting in most of the effort. When you are together, make the absolute best of it. Don’t waste time arguing and bringing up old situations that you were harboring all week. In long-distance relationships, time is very valuable.
Keep the Romance Alive
This can be tricky but it’s also important. It’s so much harder to keep the romance alive when you are in a long-distance relationship. Some suggestions I have are surprising your partner by planning a romantic date or night in. I actually have a funny story about a time I tried to surprise Rob. One of the times he came to visit me, I surprised him with a trip to the driving range. The only problem was that this was before I learned to drive so he had to drive us to his own surprise. I still made it fun because I gave him turn-by-turn directions, I refuse to let him look at the GPS & in the end he loved it!
Consistency & Effort
As I mentioned earlier, maintaining a long-distance relationship take tons of work but it’s not impossible. Along with what I mentioned above, none of it matters if you are not giving the relationship maximum effort and staying consistent. Thanks babe for adding your two cents!
If you have any tips that you use to keep your relationship thriving, feel free to let me know below!
Sincerely Chanel 💋